Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Christmas Stress

I remember wondering why people got so stressed out by Christmas. I had two (or fewer or no) children, a healthy husband, a relatively neat house, no one being schooled, and my Christmas shopping done by Thanksgiving. I loved Christmas.

But these last few years, I finally understand. Sick husband, homeschooling, crawling babies, messy house, decorations that take weeks to get up instead of one day (despite the fact that what I put up drastically shrinks every year), and shopping that takes every spare moment (even when done online - and I'm finally almost done).

It seems that no matter how many pairs of jingle bell earrings I buy and wear. No matter how many Christmassy programs or parades I attend. No matter how much Christmas music I listen to, I just can't keep a hold of that Christmas spirit. It's lost under the weight of "one more thing."

Because when you're nearly drowning in baby, kids, school, laundry, and dishes. Even the simple things in Christmas are one more thing. Straws that break that camels back. And this year they're breaking me. Especially when you add the other kinds of straws. A missed church Christmas program after dragging three kids out alone in cold rain because the auditorium was full. Misunderstandings.

But don't you learn the most when your broken? Isn't that when you learn to become dependent because no matter how hard you try, you just can't do it all? I believe I have a seriously low learning curve in this area.

I need to learn from the Teacher. I need to hear Him. I want to love Him. And I want to love Christmas again.


Stephanie said...

I know. I'm sorry it's such a struggle. I don't HS, nor do I have a sick husband. But mine does work about 80 hrs. a week so I can identify somewhat. One thing that has really help us this year is we did the bulk of our shopping in Feb. My concern now is forgetting what I bought. :) Just kidding, we keep it pretty small, but it has made a HUGE difference. It has really taken the focus off the buying and put it instead on the meaning. But I also know how hard it is with a baby. Maggie really threw me off. I forgot so much and WOW does she make me feel old. But I know I don't have to tell you how fast it goes. Hang in there. The kids aren't going to remember if all the decorations are up. They just remember having fun. And thankfully, it doesn't take much for kids to do that. :)

Hannah said...

Awww, Leasha, hang in there. It won't last forever. I still love you anyway...even with all your stress. I wish I could live closer to you so that I could help out with the kids and give you some time off just to be alone. Which, by the way, reminds long will you come up for for Christmas next year. Cause if you come for a good long time...I'm gonna be sending you off to the spa for some quality alone time with a book. LOL. Love, LOve, LOVE you!

Your Seester, Hannah

Alicia said...

Awww, Thanks, Steph and Hannah.

We should be up for at least a week, but I never crave alone time. I've never liked being alone. It's always Brian-to-myself-time that I crave.

TheNormalMiddle said...

Oh honey, I can so relate. You are not alone. It humbles me to remember that no matter if I am "ready" or not, Christmas will come and go with or without me. Just keep it as simple as you can. Much love from NC!

Hannah said...

I'm sure I can arrange a day-long date too! ;-)

Wendy said...

It can be hard to keep it simple.
I hope this week is more relaxed for you, and you are able to enjoy time w/your family!

Jacki said...

You are coming here for Christmas next year?!?! Oooohhh....

I don't have kids to home school or a sick husband do take care of, but I do understand your stress a little! As you know, the Northern Virginia area is so hectic and Peter works long hours and commutes long hours. There are times I feel like a single parent.

I like what Stephanie said. I always have to remember what the real meaning of Christmas is and to keep it simple. Being married to a Dane helps with that, because Danes are all about simple things and keeping it all about the family. They don't understand our mass consumerism.

Much love to you!!